Things I learned this weekend

In no particular order:

1.) Brisket is some pretty tasty stuff.

2.) Dog hair doesn't come out of pajama pants magically in the washing machine. Who knew you had to brush it off first? And wash things twice?

3.) Asti makes all family get-togethers even better. For AM Asti enjoyment, a mimosa. For PM Asti enjoyment, with some raspberries in the bottom of the glass. For anytime enjoyment, chug from bottle and wink at your cousin.

4.) Canal street is not a fun place to drag a little wheelie suitcase through, no matter HOW lost you are, HOW above asking for directions, HOW hot it is, and HOW you are SO-GOING-TO-MISS-THAT-CHINATOWN-BUS.

5.) It is worth getting lost in Chinatown to buy your mom a $2 pair of souvenir slippers because it made her day a little.

6.) Also worth it cuz you got yourself 2 pairs!

7.) Knitting these slippers wasn't as hard as I thought they would be. I can count, therefore; I knit. One slipper down, the other to go.

8.) Grey's Anatomy isn't going to be on until the 23rd. GRRRRR, ABC, GRRRR.

9.) Pennsylvania DMVs mean BUSINESS.

10.) And by BUSINESS, I mean make it clear how much of an idiot you are for not waiting for your camera card to get in the mail before you decide to prance into the photo center ready for some glamour shot of a new license that will be horizontal, not vertical like your UNDER 21 UNTIL APRIL 26, 2003 trading card.

11.) Attention PA drivers: That camera card is very important. Don't show up without it, lest Yvonne at the Rosemont DMV give you some 'tude for how dumb you are.

12.) Century Coach is vastly superior to Today's Bus.

13.) Some people, like the girl sitting next to me on one of my busses, would like a tattoo of an oversize octopus sitting in a lifeguard chair on a lovely shoreline.

14.) Other people at one point wanted a tattoo of Kermit on their stomach.

15.) Dave's parents two favorite stories about him as a child involve polka and a gerbil named "Husky" respectively.

16.) You can't go wrong in a sort-of-smelly Chinese restaurant with sweet and sour pork.

17.) Teen night at a local Peruvian bar is probably the scariest thing you could possibly imagine.

18.) When in doubt, shamelessly tease your boyfriend in front of his parents to gain their respect.

19.) Swiffer Wet Jet is probably the most amazing invention since pasteurization.

20.) Scrapple contains some nast pig bits. That's why it's delicious!

21.) Seltzer water is a gift from God.

22.) Septa makes me sleepy.

23.) Amtrak makes me hungry

24.) My brother Neal makes a kick ass power point presentation.

25.) My brother Kevin leaves ridiculous messages on my cousin's facebook page.

26.) I am officially too old to talk about facebook.

27.) Wawa's 2 soft pretzels for 99 cents is something to call home about.

28.) I still remember how to drive.

29.) I am impressed my 17-year-old brother Neal listens to more NPR than I do. He is well on his way to yuppie-dom.

30.) Rita's Water Ice is just as good as I remembered it.

31.) My family on both sides have the following general characteristics: Loud, hungry, gossipy, bossy and nosey.

32.) Confusing Penn station and Grand Central station is dumb when you proclaim your deep conviction that the ATM you need is there, only to realize after a few laps around that you are in the other station.

33.) Amtrak employees mumble. Both on the PA and off.

34.) When in your parents house for 24 hours, eat as much food as you can, no matter how un-hungry you are. You'll relish the memory of those 4 oreos later in your oreo-less house.

35.) Bassett hounds are a little stinky, but OH so lovable.